Breaking old patterns is hard. Learning new lifestyle behaviours and sticking to them is harder. Nothing is impossible, but that "ole stinkin' thinkin'" is very powerful. So is guilt. I was raised Catholic, so guilt has a strong hold on me. I fight it every day, but that string hangs tough to my psyche. It goes way back.I have been working hard to exercise most every day, and I eat healthily much of the time. But, my addiction is sugar and chocolate. It IS an addiction. My sister says, "Just stop it!" "Yeah, yeah, yeah", I say. "I know you're right." But, I have to choose in the moment my addiction kicks in. I choose. Not her. Not anyone else. Me. This past weekend I chose my addiction over fruit every time I wanted "something". It ain't easy.
Guilt makes me feel like such a whimp. My sister is fighting cancer for God's sake. If she can do that, I certainly can choose fruit instead of 60% dark chocolate chips on my fat-free vanilla frozen yogurt. One scoop with a few chips would be better than three with lots of chips, that's for sure. But, maybe for right now, I should just forgo the latter all together, and choose the ever-darkening pear sitting in my fruit bowl instead. I can't eat just one chip. Some days, like these days, it is just too hard. Others are much easier. Just not today.
For me it is all about shopping. I stick to the outside edges of the grocery store, which is where the "real" food is located. I don't even walk down the temptation aisles. I joke that my list of things I CAN'T buy is twice the length of my regular shopping list. If it isn't in the house, I can't be tempted.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard, I know. Just take it one decision at a time.