Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Getting Moving

Outside Amicable Congregational Church
I read in the Sakonnet Times this morning that the Tiverton Community Chorus is starting up again. I wanted to join this chorus last season.  I thought I'd be away for five weeks during it, and the music director encouraged me not to come because I'd miss too many rehearsals. Even though the invitation in the newspaper seemed open and welcoming, she seemed strict and rigid. She reminded me of the nuns at St. Catherine's elementary school in Norwood, Massachusetts. I was afraid of them, but couldn't wait to carry the bag of my favorite each morning as we anxiously waited for them to come down the hill towards the school from the adjoining convent.

I still want to join the chorus, but I realized I am afraid. What could I possibly be afraid of? I love to sing. I used to be able to read music. If someone asked me to sing a "C" note, I couldn't, but I can follow a music sheet if given the starting note. I know what a whole note is, a half note and a sliding note. I can follow along quite well, and I would be part of a chorus after all. I can follow along with the section to which I become assigned: soprano or alto. I think now I am more comfortable as a alto, even though I spent my life as a soprano.

This is the display every Christmas.


And, joining the chorus would be an excellent opportunity to meet new people and make new friends in my town. The Amicable Congregational Church is not very far. It's just on the edge of Four Corners. I could walk there in nice weather. It meets every Thursday night from 7:30 to 9:30. Not bad. Is it that I don't want to make a commitment? Is television so important to me that I can't leave the house? That was the case periodically in my life. I want to move on from that reality in my retirement. Of course, my greatest wish remains to find something Larry and I can do together. But, other than attending plays through our subscription at the Huntington Theater in Boston and bowling every Tuesday night, that was the last time we had something fun to do together that brought us out. We stopped doing both because of the distance, and can't seem to find anything else right now.

I think the "chainsaw" artist did these.
I remain hopeful that I'll succeed in finding something eventually. Doing the chorus alone just reminds me of all the times I did things alone as a single woman. One of the reasons I got married was to not do everything alone again: chorus, exercise; whatever. We go to the movies occasionally. We had a movie date on New Year's Eve. We saw the latest Sherlock Holmes movie and it was fun. I guess I need more than the occasional outing, and feel a little guilty saying that out loud over and over again. Sorry, Larry,


Our social needs are just different I guess. I used to be such a "social butterfly". Now, my life is much more isolated. Country living is wonderful, but unless one gets one's butt out of the house, one spends way too much time alone. The problem is home is very comfortable, and I have gotten very lazy. It all seems like work, and I can't even get myself to clean. I just feel lazy. How long will I allow myself to stay home like this? I don't know. But now, Thursday night, the first night of Open Sing of the Chorus is looming large and weighing heavy.

Doing something I enjoy and getting out should be a light and enjoyable experience. Maybe I just have to shift my thinking and get my butt out the door at 7:15pm on Thursday. Maybe I have to make that call to get an hour with a personal trainer. More exercise would help elevate my energy level. Yadda, yadda, yadda.

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