Nurturing Retreat Day 3

After coffee this morning, Barbara told us the humidity kept our masks sticky. She dried them on a warm stove while we did our next painting project. We took out our journals and she demonstrated making a thick line. Then she made branches off that line with more branches and lines off those. She encouraged us to try both our brushes, and I relished in the fine lines my other brush could create. I made this huge, expanding tree branch with lots and lots of branches of blue and greens. Then I added golden pollen pods all over.

She then told us to paint our clay vessels into this picture. Our painted vessel didn't have to be an exact replica of the clay version, and indeed mine changed. I used purple, flesh and gold colors. The flat bowl had more of a pedastal to fit onto a tree branch and golden rays rose out of it upward. I thought it was done. Barbara encouraged me to dig deeper by focusing on one blank corner. I stemmed my frustration at thinking I was done, and did as she suggested. I found a red flower of heart shapes growing on a branch with a lime-green background. Time was up and I was grateful to her for pushing me just a little. She said that she would do this for us throughout.

To break up each day, we took walks outdoors. The first day after lunch, I explored a dirt path through the woods to the Westport River we could only see from on high the porch. It was a lovely path with arch supports erected here and there to keep the jungle away from the path and high overhead. Below on the river was a lone row boat at the end of the pier, and the views up and down the river were magnificent. I sat in the sun on a rock and just breathed. My trek back up hill got my heart pumping really well. Today, Barbara took us to Westport Town Beach that could only be accessed by permit if you lived on the Point. She led us on a lovely, long walk on a surprisingly beautiful sandy beach. I was surprised because our beach is rocky. I didn't expect such an expanse of sand here, and was well pleased. I love a sandy beach. We collected trinkets to adorn our masks like shells and feathers. It was very refreshing, and our bare feet in the sand and the ocean felt magnificent.

Back in the dining room, we fetched our masks. I had no idea what to do next. I watched as other dove into colors and began painting their faces that were not their faces with abandon. I decided my face would be gold. I made sure I had a nice even golden coating over all, and needed to use a hair dryer on some areas I thought needed extra paint. What was I supposed to do next? It was hard figuring out how to adorn my face that was not my face. These masks and our paintings were meant to give a voice to that voice inside us that is never allowed to speak. What will they say? I just let it flow.


I began with royal blue eyeliner, Egyptian style, but extended it out to the side as if the blue were glasses instead. Then I put black wavy lines over the upper and lower eyes. I painted half the eyes with silver and then had to decide if I wanted pupils. I tried one, and it was heart shaped. I liked it and added one to the other even though the eyes now looked kind of creepy. Then I added lashes up and down. I gave her lipstick and a smile, and glued sea shells on her face. Then I glued one of those 1970's seashell necklaces around her face creating hair adornments and earrings plus a hanger in back. Wiring on the sides helped hold this in place. I found a "Love" heart bead with a scrimshaw rose on it too and that became her "third eye". From that I painted lines to create a place for colored, shiny beads and feathers to create a headdress. I put a bead over the miniature sand dollar too. When she was finished, she was a little hard to look at. We put them on the mantle in the living room.

After dinner, Barbara had us all sit in the living room and look at our masks to see if they would speak to us. In turn, we shared what they said. Mine told me that the growths on my face that are benign and can be ugly are not. I accept them and embrace them because I inherited them from my mother, and they make my face unique. Barbara asked me to describe my mask in three words. I said Light, Joy and Love. These are what my mask represents for me. I am those things, and all I have to do is wear them with courage and ground in them. I felt those words in my core, and they were good.